Tips for Taking Care of Yourself this Christmas
What a rollercoaster this time of year can be! The joy of sharing the holiday season with our families and children, coupled with elated and very tired children (and caregivers!) after a big year of school and not to forget stress related to family gatherings and managing finances can make this time a stressful experience. And for others, Christmas can also bring feeling of sadness, loneliness or grief. All sorts of feelings can come to the surface at a time when fatigue levels impact on our tolerance for uncomfortable emotions, further contributing to the challenging time.
Finding ways to take care of yourself is always important, but particularly so around this time of year. By coming up with a concrete plan you’re taking a preventative approach to looking after yourself.
We have shared a few ideas to help out.
Create Boundaries
If you’re feeling anxious about spending time with particular people what are some ways that you can create boundaries to prioritise your own needs? Maybe you could limit the amount of time you spend with certain people? Or perhaps plan ahead to take time-out before you reach a point where you feel overwhelmed. Watching out for your body’s own warning signs of stress can be helpful, whether that be racing thoughts, a faster heart rate, tense shoulders or clenched hands and then take a break to regulate your own emotions.
Stay connected to what matters most to you
It’s very easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of end-of-year functions, shopping, food and logistics as we prepare for Christmas Day. Consider ways that you can stay connected to the bigger picture. What really matters to you? Being with people you love and care about? Slowing down and really giving yourself a proper break? Having a laugh and letting go a bit? Easing up on yourself? Aim to keep your values as a motivating factor for decisions about the holiday period.
Think of your sensory and regulation needs
This time of year often involves spending extended time with other people. If you’re someone who needs to recuperate by having time on your own, give some thought to ways that you can consciously create space for yourself. Time in nature can be a highly regulating and calming experience, so time outside can be helpful to have that cuppa and time with yourself, or some quiet time with your favourite music or book can be equally as helpful. It’s also helpful to consider your sensory needs, whether this be some time away from increased noise, choosing clothing that feels comfortable to you or having a discreet object to fiddle with to calm your emotions. A hair tie or rubber band around your wrist to fiddle with can be great, some blue-tack in your pocket or any other ideas of your own are very handy.
Try to bring yourself into the present moment
Sometimes, time with family can mean we can spend a large portion of our time up in our heads worrying about the future or rehashing the past. When we get swept up by our minds we miss the beauty and simplicity of everyday things like having a good chat or spending time in the sunshine.
One of the most effective ways to anchor yourself in the here-and-now is to tune into your five senses. So when you notice yourself getting carried off by thoughts, bring yourself back to the present moment by deliberately focusing your attention on what you can see, hear, taste, smell and touch. For example, as you’re eating lunch try to notice all of the colours in the room around you, the smell of the food on your plate, the texture and taste of the food as you eat it, the feeling of your body making contact with the chair, the sounds of conversations around you. It can help to quieten down those thoughts about the past and future and help you enjoy the present moment more.
Calm your mind by calming your breathing
If you notice your buttons being pushed by a particular situation or person, or you just need to pause for a moment, one of the most effective ways to put the brakes on is to focusing on your breathing. This can help your brain from being flooded and overwhelmed with strong emotions, which then impacts on your brain’s capacity to make positive and logical decisions.
Slow breathing (breathe in for 3 seconds, hold for 3 seconds and breathe out for 3 seconds) and belly breathing (breathe from your stomach where you can see your stomach rise and fall) can be helpful to regulate your breathing (and subsequently, your emotions and your logical decision making capacity. Aim to practice these beforehand where possible so they are familiar to you before you need them.
Opportunities for community connection
The festive season for some, can be a challenging time and can bring up some feelings of loneliness or grief, whether this be related to experiences of loss, distance from loved ones, fertility challenges or family life turning out different than initially hoped or expected. It can be helpful to think of other ways to experience meaning and connection, which can also include connection to community. This may include opportunities to connect with a neighbour or a local community group. Being around others and sharing joy with others can be a great mood enhancer.
Options for support during the Christmas and New Year period
If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, in need of support or just wanting to chat during the Christmas or New Year period, Beyondblue and Lifeline have experienced people ready to talk 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Beyondblue: Ph: 1300 22 46 36
Lifeline: 13 11 14